“No single decision you ever made has led in a straight line to where you find yourself now. You peeked down some roads and took a few steps before turning back. You followed some roads that came to a dead end and others that got lost at too many intersections. Ultimately, all roads are connected to all other roads.”
I am entering my second month of unemployment, or what I’d like to call “fun-employment”. Don’t feel bad for me – it was a path I chose for the well-being of my body and heart, and I took all precautions in preparation for the monthly income drop.
It’s been an incredible experience to literally hit the pause button on life, to reconnect with myself, and deepen relationships with the ones I love. I have also learned a few important lessons on happiness…
You know how all philosophers, prophets, and parents say, “Happiness comes from within”? We hear this over and over again, and with such repetition we often accept it with blind faith as we trudge through our everyday lives. We allow ourselves so few opportunities to actually experience this inner bliss, so much so that we ultimately forget how to recognize it when it’s staring us in the face. The straight A’s, the fancy apartment, the fat bonus, the dozens of friends, the luxurious vacations, the handsome boyfriend, the newest iPhone, the size 2 dress… We’re still unhappy.
I’m not perfect, and have just skimmed the tip of the iceberg on tapping into this inner resource of happiness. It’s taken me 25+ years, a few broken hearts, hopping the globe from the Caymans to Iceland to Morocco, living on a relatively excellent paycheck to having $2.00 to my name, and feeling completely alone in the wilderness to realize that happiness can really only be expressed. Not ours for the taking and holding inward, but truly reaching from within ourselves and giving it back to others. It’s as if we’re each holding a little sun within ourselves – a bright resource that regenerates over and over again. The more we give, the happier we are. It’s a pretty simple science.
It’s just not easily duplicated because of all the superfluous garbage in the material worlds we live in. Add an inner frustration to the mix as we perpetually put ourselves down, saying we don’t deserve happiness for all the terrible things we’ve done… What have I done to deserve this? Exist. Don’t let the question be, Why Me? – More like, Yes, Me!
There are many paths I have yet to take, but having come from one that was equally as exciting as it was intensely challenging, I’m ready for what lies ahead. I’m thinking of going back into the environmental field – whether it be working at a consultancy or state department, you can’t take the science out of me 🙂
Besides, I’m fully entitled to change my mind at any moment in time and hop onto another path! I just have decided to chose happiness over all. And the next time I’m feeling down, it’s time to take a good look at myself in the mirror and truly ask why. Life is pretty simple, and I truly believe we are all predisposed to living in a state of bliss. Again, I’m far from perfect, and the occasional trip to Anthro and frequent bowl of ice cream can bring some (temporary) happiness.
Be calm, be happy my friends!
-ps this entire post is my way of procrastinating in preparation for my interviews this week… back to it!